Friday, May 22, 2015

On having a daughter

There is just something so special about having a little girl. I always always always wanted a daughter. I used to imagine what she would look like, how she would act, how I would dress her. And you know what? It's even more fun than I imagined. Watching this littler person grow is the biggest privilege I have ever been given. It tears my heart into pieces that the years are now FLYING by but they are the best ones yet. Sure, it's way more fun shopping for her than for myself (HELLOOOOOO so much cuter stuff) but she is at the age where she can start doing all of the things I always dreamed of doing with my daughter. DANCE LESSONS! SWIMMING! SHOPPING! NAILS! HAIR! She is such a fun mix of Devin and I (although, she LOOKS just like him). It still shocks me when I see photos of us together. I am dark, and she is as fair as they come. But she is still mine. Our attitudes are very similar (help me!). Devin always says, "She may look like Daddy but she acts like Mommy!" She loves to go shopping, all the Disney princesses, baby dolls, pink, and anything sparkly. But she still loves the outdoors like her daddy. She loves to help him outside with watering the plants and playing in the dirt. She also loves sleeping bags, dragons, and ninja turtles. She definitely goes through phases as to which parent is her favorite (usually it's whoever gives in!) My girl loves shoes. ANY shoes. She loves to put on Mommy's shoes and walk around the house. She also loves to try and get her doll shoes on her feet and she gets frustrated when they don't fit. I have a feeling she will be able to sympathize with all those characters in Cinderella who couldn't get the glass slipper to fit. She is testing the waters of independence. It's kind of scary how much she really DOESN'T need me anymore. She can get her own snacks, she doesn't think she needs to hold my hand as much anymore, and wants to dress herself. I find myself being pushing slowly and slowly away as she figures out who she is. Maybe that's how this whole parenting gig will be?
Me helping her along as she figures things out for herself? I still rely on my mom a lot but it's kind of sad that someday she really won't need me at all (or at least it feels like that). I just want to keep her little for forever! This season of life is challenging but it's so so beautiful. Having little people in your home is a joy I never knew until recently. Hearing giggles and  her little feet running upstairs as she plays with Lucy. Watching her snuggle her daddy. Walking into her room and seeing her sitting in her rocking chair with her babies "reading" to them. All the feels guys, all the feels. My little girl is always so concerned when someone is sad. Especially babies. Her new thing is to ask, "What happened?" She is such a sensitive little soul. I love that she never gives up trying. I love that she loves her blankies. I love that everything we do these days is "TIME!"... "BREAKFAST TIME"... "NAPPY TIME"... "POTTY TIME"... "CAR RIDE TIME"... She is my joy.

{If you are curious my dress is from JCrew and my shoes are NineWest. Charlotte's dress is Baby Gap and her shoes are from Gymboree} 

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